Thursday, November 29, 2012

growing in virtue: patience

I think I've mentioned a time or two that I struggle with patience.
And it's not just with waiting for people or food or whatever...it's with EVERYTHING.
Legit.

But lately, mostly with my husband.

Oh, you didn't know that I have a husband?
Well, I do.
We're just not married yet, aaaaand I don't know who he is.
Bummer.

I know that I should be enjoying my "single years"....full of freedom and independence and yaddahyaddah
And, in some ways, I am...I mean, I love life, and my life is pretty good.
But I struggle a lot with enjoying the "right now" and not focusing on "someday"....

I think this is something that we as a culture struggle with - not seeing what's right in front of us - but it's so difficult to stop searching and just let God do His thing.
And I think one of my problems is that I've done the novenas and the dating fasts and the "think of every man you encounter simply as a brother in Christ" and it all helps...but there's still that ever-present yearning, aching, desiring to be united with him. I know that in some cases, my intentions with the aforementioned "cures" were just that: I would do all of these things and THEN God would say "Well done, my good and faithful servant....here's your hubby!"

Buuuut that's not how these things work.
And I know that....but it's still sooooo hard to just be and allow Him to lead me.

One thing that He has given me that has helped a bit is theveilofchastity.com ...finally! A blog that is FOR SINGLE PEOPLE! I lovelovelove the mommy and wifey blogs that I read...truly, I do. But sometimes, I get so caught up in their stories, in their lives, that I find myself hoping that my story is half as cool as theirs.
Well, what the heck?! It's MY story! It's going to be perfect for ME!
Which brings me to another post that helped me a lot, called Dating Tip #1: You Don't Have to Date
oh.
my.
gosh.

This post clarified everything that I've been questioning:
"why am I single? what's wrong with me?"
"why am I the only one of my friends who doesn't have a boyfriend/fiance/husband?"
"so-and-so got married at my age and I'm not even dating anyone?! OMG!!!!!!"

But what I have to realize is that I'm not THEM.
I have my own story, my own life. And no matter what happens, no matter when I meet Mr. Right and get married and have children, it will be perfect for ME. And that is what matters most.

It's definitely a struggle, but I have confidence that with every passing day, I'm one step closer to meeting "him"...would you join me in praying for him? And me too if you wouldn't mind ;)

4 comments:

  1. I can't wait to check out that site! :) Thanks for sharing.

    Ya know.. it IS hard sometimes with all of the singleness. But, I do believe that this time of your (and my) life, being single is our vocation. God is using us in this time for His purpose, even if it doesn't feel like it. I mean, this is always easier said than done, but I have to believe it's true.

    Prayers for you and and your future hubby! A few prayers this way would be wonderful, too! :)

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  2. Thanks for the shout out, Morgan! :) So happy The Veil of Chastity blog has ministered to you. I can't wait to check our your blog! God bless and thank you again, Cindy

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  3. Can you just move closer to me so that we can be single friends together? Great, thanks. :)

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  4. I'm married but I understand the struggle with patience. Obviously it's not about finding a spouse but with work/career-related stuff.

    I think it's great that you're recognizing that it isn't about making someone else's story your own, but enjoying your story. Reading certain blogs . . . have made me jealous at times and I just have to sit back and remember how blessed I am.

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