Not Alone Series: Britt's Survey!

Britt emailed us a few weeks ago with the idea to do a survey of sorts and I was so excited. These surveys bring me back to the days of email chain surveys...ahh fond memories :)

But really, I think it's a great way for us to get to know one another better!

And you be forewarned, I'm a big fan of over-explaining.

Heeeeere we gooooo!

1. Age

I am a ripe ol' age of 23 :)

2. Area of country (be as specific or vague as your comfort levels allow :)

I'm preeetty sure if you poked around in my various social media accounts, you'd find my exact location, but for now I'll say Central Illinois. I was raised about an hour outside of Chicago and did my undergrad at ISU.

3. # of previous relationships (....as in, at least "FB official")

Well, if we're only going with FB offish, then I have been in two relationships. Although the first wasn't FB offish because I didn't have FB until freshman year of college and we dated my senior year of high school.

Maybe I'll write more sometime about my past relationships/what I learned (I just realized that I haven't really talked about them) ...but basically it's been a little over 3 years since my last relationship.

4. What do you do with your life? School? Work? Both? Neither?

I graduated from college with my degree in Psychology in 2012 and was offered a job exactly a week later :)
I currently work full-time in the Pro-Life movement (though I choose to refrain from saying which organization I work for)

5. What's your family like? (let's see some pics!)

Ahhhh my family. They're great. I'm the eldest of 4 kids, 2 boys and 2 girls. I did a series on them back when I first started blogging. 

post-mass photo op

It's me, Tommy (21), Michael (20), and Tara (17).

PS I'm the shortest in my fam at 5'10''
L to R: Michael, Morgan, Tara, Tommy

My parents are fabulous too and we as a family are super tight-knit.
(our initials go as such: JJMTMT...pretty funny :)

But that's just my immediate family. We're also really close with both sides of my extended family. 

My dad is the youngest of 8 kids and we're blessed to be close with our aunts, uncles, and cousins. 

This is most of my Dad's side...we're missing one of my cousins and her family.

And my mom is the eldest of 3 and her family...oh man, they're crazy. Like in the best way possible.

this is from 2011, but it's the most recent group pic we've got!
and we're missing one of my cousins and his family :(

cousin tradition! squeeze on Granny's couch!
little Lilly is the first great-grandchild! she's a doll!

Uncle Tom is who we get all the crazy genes from...

But I think one of the things I love most about my family is that we know our extended family. That's one thing that's always been important to my parents. I know my great-aunts and uncles on both sides as well as my 2nd, 3rd, 4th, etc cousins. We not only know our extended extended family, but we're close with them, too!
And we LOVE family vacations and we LOVE family reunions and we LOVE family holidays.
Some people tolerate their families...we soak time up with them as often as possible :)

P.S. both of my brothers are single, soooo if you're interested...jkjk. kind of. ;)

6. How did your parents meet? (let's hear the story!!)

My parents met on a blind date set up by my great-grandmother.
No joke.

Some background knowledge: my great-grandpa died when my mom was 12 but my great-grandma remarried when she was in her 60s and my (step)great-grandpa was the only one I ever knew. He had 3 sons so when they married, my mom inherited (step)uncles and some (step)aunts (therefore my step great uncles and aunts).

You're welcome for the family history. You'll need it later.

So my mom was living with my GGs after she graduated from college and earned some extra cash by cleaning for her (step)aunt. While dusting the family photos, she asked who one of the guys was and jokingly asked if he was single because he was kinda cute. Turns out my aunt had a younger (and single!) brother. My aunt talked to GGma and she thought it was a GREAT idea. Grandma had met Dad all of maybe two times, but she knew he was cute and polite, so hey, what else do you need?

Before they went out for the first time, my GGpa was talking my dad up with all sorts of flattery...
"he's a good Catholic boy!" .... "he's got a good job!" ... "he likes to play cards!"

That last one reeeeally got my mom thinking he was a winner ;)

So aaaaanyway, my dad drove up from Chicagoland to Milwaukee where my mom was living and they danced all night...literally.
Because the bars never closed. You just lifted your feet up for them to sweep underneath.

**CURSE YOU IL WITH YOUR 2AM LAST-CALLS!!!!**

Which would explain why they were out until 4AM "talking".

At which point my dad drove my mom home and my GGma was up waiting for her.
Since he was a scaredy cat, Dad didn't walk Mom up to the door, but she understood.
GGma was scary when she was mad.

But they both knew that it was love and 2 years later, they wed!
Which then turned my mom's great aunt into her sister-in-law. It's not weird if you know the story.

And that, folks, is why I would never turn down a blind date set-up...sometimes it works out!

7. Confirmation saint name and why (if you were Catholic at that point in your journey)

I made my confirmation during my sophomore year of high school (normal for our parish) and I chose St. Cecilia as my confirmation saint name. I chose her, first because I love music and second because Cecelia is my maternal grandmother's middle name.

8. Favorite Gospel?

Ok, I'll be honest...I don't really have one. I love them all and haven't ever done a study of the Gospels so I'm not biased. But I do love John 3:16 so I'll choose John :)

9. What are the top three qualities you're looking for in a husband? (who knows, maybe one of us has a cousin or friend to connect you with! ;)

haha I love this question and the reasoning behind it! Can we assume that "Catholic" is a given? I'm going to say so :) ...with that out of the way, my top three qualities are:

1. He must be kind and affectionate

Hopefully this is self-explanatory...but authentic kindness is so important as well as affection. Maybe these two qualities don't naturally go hand in hand, but I guess I've always associated them with one another.

2. He must be intelligent

I've dated guys before who couldn't carry on a conversation about anything but sports...he doesn't have to be a rocket scientist, but I want to be able to rant about autism theories or philosophical topics and for him to be able to keep up AND contribute!

3. He must be tall (at least 6'0'')

Maybe this sounds superficial, but it's important to me...thus far, I haven't been attracted to shorter guys. Plus, I think there's a certain comfort that comes with being with a guy who you know can protect you...shouldn't have to be the other way around.

10. If you've done online dating, do you have any advice or experiences to share?

I've never done online dating, but I would say it's important to be 100% honest and upfront with what you're looking for. That way, people know exactly what they're going to get. (ex: being upfront about looking for a chaste relationship, etc.)

11. Tweetable single-lady advice (140 characters or less of what you'd say to other single ladies)

seek to become the most authentic YOU you can be. seek to be happy AS YOU ARE. seek to live in the NOW. seek to soak in TODAY. #NAS
— Morgan McFarlin (@thatprolifegirl) August 27, 2013

12. What is your favorite thing to do outside of blogging and work/school?

Fact about me: I don't just have one favorite, so I can't narrow this down. Outside of work, there's not much free time (since my hours are usually late morning-ish to 9 or 10PM) and when I'm not having major writers block (read: almost always), most of my free time is writing posts. BUT I have hobbies! I do.

I like to sew. I LOVE to read (with no internet in my apt, I read 3 books last week). I like crafts...painting things and such. I like to cook and bake. I like to sing and jam with people (I was in a worship band in college).

BUT really, if I have a bunch of free time, I love hanging out with my friends. Especially ones with babies. And more often than not, I spend my free weekends helping my friends do something in their homes...usually painting, but I am also a GREAT caulk-er. As if on cue for this post, Sunday night I painted said baby-having friend's kitchen.
It was great.

Answer these questions and link-up with us over at Jen's!

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Next week's topic:

Peace

Where do you find it and how do you keep it?

(inspired by Jen's Follow the Peace post)

8/13: Should/can women pursue men?
What do you think? Any and all perspectives welcome!!!

Not Alone Series: friendly love

This week the topic is "Love within Friendship".

We talk a lot about romantic love, so it's a nice change of pace :)

I will be the first to say that love within friendship is different from romantic love. But regardless of the type of relationship, this love should be present.

Why? Well, because Jesus told us....

"This is my commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends." - John 15:12,13

Guess what, people? Loving your friends can be hard - no, scratch that, it WILL be hard. But look at what Jesus says! We're meant to lay down our lives for our friends! 

Laying down our lives - whether that be in the form of holding them accountable, or in sacrificing your "free time" to invest in your relationship, or in learning to stretch and grow into a new "season" of you friendship after one of you gets married or has a baby.

Being a good friend...and LOVING your friends isn't always easy. It takes effort.

One of my favorite and least favorite ways to love my friends is through accountability.

It's my least favorite because it's hard and sometimes awkward and potentially hurtful.

But it's my favorite because it's true love. Accountability helps build my friends up in an eternal way.

A good friend doesn't just sit idly by and watch their friend live their life in a way that isn't building them up.

No.

A good friend challenges them to be better. THAT is how we love them! Real love of a friend isn't appeasing them or "accepting" them no matter what. A good, loving friend is one who seeks to constantly help his/her friend get closer to heaven. 

And I know that not saying anything when my friend is nearing alcoholism is not loving them.

Not saying anything when my friend is in a relationship that isn't good for her soul is not loving her.

Not saying anything when my friend has stopped attending mass on a regular basis is not loving them.

Not saying anything when my friend decides to live with his girlfriend before marriage is not loving him.

These conversations might definitely will be awkward. 

Someone might walk away hurt or angry. But in doing everything with love, I've found that those who are hurt or angry eventually see that you were only trying to love them in the most authentic way you could.

Calling a friend to something higher than what they're living isn't judgmental, it's LOVE.

I hope this makes sense....and if not, maybe I can clarify in a later post. Or, if you disagree with me, leave me a comment! This week has already left my brain feeling fried and it's only Tuesday when you're reading this and only Monday when I wrote this...

Link up below with your perspective on love in friendship!

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Next week's topic:

Survey!

Answer the following questions so we can get to know one another a bit better!

1. Age

2. Area of country (be as specific or vague as your comfort levels allow :)
3. # of previous relationships (....as in, at least "FB official")
4. What do you do with your life? School? Work? Both? Neither?
5. What's your family like? (let's see some pics!)
6. How did your parents meet? (tell us the story!)
7. Confirmation saint name and why (if you were Catholic at that point in your journey)
8. Favorite Gospel?
9. What are the top three qualities you're looking for in a husband? (who knows, maybe one of us has a cousin or friend to connect you with! ;)
10. If you've done online dating, do you have any advice or experiences to share?
11. Tweetable single-lady advice (140 characters or less of what you'd say to other single ladies)
12. What is your favorite thing to do outside of blogging and work/school?

8/6: Peace
Where do you find it and how do you keep it?
(inspired by Jen's Follow the Peace post)

8/13: Should/can women pursue men?
What do you think? Any and all perspectives welcome!!!

TAG!

Amanda tagged me in this game of...whatever we're calling it...tag, mayhaps?
Well, I can't resist a good Q&A, so here goes nothing!

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1.) The first rule is to post these rules.
2.) Post a photo of yourself then write 11 things about you/your life.
3.) Answer the questions for you set in the original post.
4.) Create 11 new questions and tag people to answer them.
5.) Go to their blog/twitter to tell them you have tagged them.

I like chips.

11 things about me:

1. ....ok, this is a lot harder than I thought it would be....usually when people ask for me to say something that they wouldn't know, I'd say that I have a blog....but....duh.

2. OH! Here's something people might find interesting....Marc Cardaronella is the DRE at my parish! How awesome is that?! I didn't know he was a big deal until a couple weeks ago. Pretty sweet, yeah?

3. I wish life was a musical or at least had a background soundtrack playing constantly....I just really love music!

4. Umm.....oh, I can sing. Pretty well, I hear. (pun not intended ;) On my way back from NC this weekend, we were belting Defying Gravity. I was impressed by my skillz.

5. I think I'm really funny. Like, I laugh at the funny things I say. It's quite amusing.

6. So, I'm the oldest of 4 kids....I have two brothers and a sister....and according to my family, I'm the one who starts the most trouble. They call me the "pot stirrer" because I come home, stir everything up and then back away to watch the crazy ensue. 

7. My family and I are really close...and we're all really close with our extended family which is a huge blessing. I was the maid-of-honor in my cousin's wedding this June and gave a BA toast....the best pictures are below:

isn't she a beautiful bride?!

8. Sorry...that last one turned into a photo-dump. Whoops. Well, I live about 4 hours from my family (minus my brother out at PITT), so it's a good thing that I have friends right here in town....and more than are moving here this month! My favorite, by far is this little monkey:

9. And going off of that last one, I love babies. A LOT. It's a joke in my family that I have a baby radar that can sense a baby from miles away. That might be only a slight exaggeration.

10. I've never been out of the U.S. Not even to Canada. It's kind of sad, but I've seen a lot of our nation, so that's a plus :)

11. My first name is both Irish Gaelic (meaning rocky crag) and German (Morgen = morning), my middle name is Catholic (Veronica), and my last name is Irish (it's a "Mc" :)....and I'm half Irish, half German, and 100% Catholic :)

Questions Amanda asked of me:

1. What is your favorite thing to blog about, or which post of yours is your favorite?

hmmm well, I obviously really like talking about single-people topics, seeing that that's pretty much all I post these days but I mostly enjoy writing about things around me, things I've observed or experienced that interest me...yeah. And I'll cheat....this is one of my favorite posts :)

2. Who is your favorite band at the moment?

agghhh Amanda! Don't do this to me! I love music. Like, ALL music. Even head-banging metal music* but right now I love me some Mumford and Sons....and Jack Johnson.....and Lady Antebellum....and The Band Perry....and Lorde....and....I'll stop now.

*in specific settings

3. If you were going to die tomorrow and you could go anywhere before you died, where would you spend your last day on earth?

Millerville, MN - my family has been going up there every year since before I was born for vacation in the summer and it's my favorite place in the world. My best friends are up there and I just love it. Just a few cabins smack dab in between two lakes surrounded by soybean and corn fields.

Heaven.

4. What is your favorite prayer (outside of the Mass)?

I really love the Salve Regina. English and Latin. Sung or recited. I love it all.

5. What song or movie do you turn on at the end of bad day?

ooooo...I don't really have one that I turn to currently, but Dark Blue by Jack's Mannequin was my jam back in HS. Used to play that bad boy on repeat.

6. Which season of the year is your favorite and why?

I truly and honestly love them all, but if I had to choose, I would say Spring. New life beginning and the smell of spring in the air after dry, cold winters is the best.

7. Which liturgical season is your favorite and why?

Triduum. Hands down. I fell in love with the Triduum season during college when it felt like we were basically living at the Cathedral. The best year was when after the Easter Vigil mass, Bishop Jenky invited all college students into his home for a party. Best. Day. Ever.

8. Would you rather be taking pictures or be in the pictures?

Can I choose both? Lately, I'm in more pictures than I take myself, but I don't really have a preference. 

But I'm definitely not one of those "no no no I don't want to be in the picture!" kind of people :)

9. What is the best deal you ever got on a piece of clothing and what did you buy?

I've been lucky multiple times, but usually when I'm on vacation somewhere....but I think the best deal I ever got was at White House | Black Market at an outlet mall in Gulf Shores, AL. 

I bought a silk skirt for $9.99....I'm not sure what original retail was but their skirts usually range from $50-$100. 

So yeah. Awesome.

10. What is the best piece of advice/or wisdom you ever heard from your mother?

Whatever's meant to be will be - no sense in worrying about what you can't control.

11. If you could go back in time five years and tell yourself one thing, what would you tell your younger self?

Chill the heck out. Stop freaking out about your future....planning ahead isn't a bad thing, but you have to expect that changes will occur. Life is a lot easier if you learn to adapt and thrive during transition.


Questions for those tagged:

1. What is the longest roadtrip you've ever taken?
2. Where was your favorite vacation destination you've ever been?
3. Favorite frugal-ish place to clothing shop? (need some help over here! :)
4. Easiest I-worked-all-day-but-don't-want-McDonalds-AGAIN recipe? (link-up if you can!)
5. What did you want to be when you were younger?
6. Any books you're currently reading?
7. What is your favorite TV show at the moment? (or coming back in the Fall!)
8. True or False: ice cream makes most bad days better?
9. Do you journal? If so, where and what time of day?
10. What are your favorite fruits and veggies?
11. Do you thrift? What was your best find?


And I'll tag:

Jordan @ Occasional Humor
Katy @ Young American Catholic
Katrina @ Cedars & Tiny Flowers
Stephanie @ Captive the Heart
Lauren @ Focus on the Fiat
Stacey @ The Girl with the Lily Tattoo

Amanda tagged pretty much everyone I would have initially thought of, but I'm excited to have the chance to introduce y'all to some newbie bloggers....and hopefully this will give some of them (*ahem*JORDAN*) the kick in the pants they need to get back into the blogging world ;)

xo, mo

Not Alone Series: challenge ACCEPTED!

Hello hello!

This week we are talking about what challenge we...challenged....ourselves to complete.

So when this was first presented, I really had no idea what I was going to do. A couple of suggestions were to join Catholic Match or if you feel called to religious life, talk to a sister....something to help you along the road to your vocation.

Well, as you likely already know, I feel very strongly called to married life. And I'm single, so at first I thought of maybe joining Catholic Match. Seemed like an easy option.
I'll be honest, there was a time when I thought that joining a dating website was really desperate. Or something that I would only consider if I was 45 and single.
While I no longer have that attitude and see online dating as a perfectly fine option (and am actually open to it), I had this feeling of hesitation.
It no longer came from the "ahh no way am I doing that, that's tooootally desperate" feeling, but rather a "oh my gosh I don't want to do that. what if someone actually wants to take me on a date?! I don't want that right now!!!"

Woah.
Never had those thoughts before.

So, following what my heart was telling me, I decided to choose a challenge that would help me to prepare for my vocation. After all, we should always be aiming to prepare for the future, yeah? Good habits don't come along with a marriage certificate.

I'm not sure how much I've talked about this, but I really hate exercise. And I also really love food.
Neither of those traits are death-sentences, but I've been trying to get myself to live a healthier lifestyle. Plus I know that when I get married and have kids that I want to already have that in place so that my family will be healthy.
So, I decided that my challenge would be to workout more.
Super vague, I know, and honesty hour: I failed.
Like big time. Like, I worked out once.
BUT like Britt, I'm resolving to do these this from now on.
AND since you all know about it now, I feel more pressure to follow through :)

So, I'm challenging myself to exercise every day.
Even if all that means is that I take a walk around my neighborhood after work.
OR maybe I get up a half hour earlier than usual to hang out with Jillian Michaels.
It's going to take determination and discipline, but I know I can do it....I just have to do it, ya know?

Soooooo what did you challenge yourself to do? Or what are you challenging yourself to do in the future?
Link-up over at Jen's!

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Next week's topic:

What is Love in Friendship?

What is Love? More specifically, what is Love within Friendship?

How do you Love your friends? How is this different from a romantic relationship? Is it different?

Interpret as you will....

Thank you to everyone who sent us topic suggestions! Here are the next few topics!

8/27: Survey of Sorts - let's get to know one another better!

Britt had the idea to do an email-chain type of survey to get to know one another better! Below are the questions to answer...we might add more, so stay tuned next week for edits! :)

1. Age

2. Area of country (be as specific or vague as your comfort levels allow :)

3. # of previous relationships (....as in, at least "FB official")

4. What do you do with your life? School? Work? Both? Neither?

5. What's your family like? (let's see some pics!)

6. Confirmation saint name and why (if you were Catholic at that point in your journey)

7. Favorite Gospel?

8. What are the top three qualities you're looking for in a husband? (who knows, maybe one of us has a cousin or friend to connect you with! ;)

9. If you've done online dating, do you have any advice or experiences to share?

10. Tweetable single-lady advice (140 characters or less of what you'd say to other single ladies)

8/6: Peace

Where do you find it and how do you keep it?

(inspired by Jen's Follow the Peace post)

8/13: Should/can women pursue men?
What do you think? Any and all perspectives welcome!!!

Please email Jen or email me with your topic suggestions, questions, comments, etc.

Not Alone Series: envy and singlehood

Aaaaaand we're back for another topic in the Not Alone Series!

This week the topic is Envy and Singlehood...and this week I remembered that it's Tuesday!

However, I just moved and don't have wifi in my apartment yet, which is why I'm a tad bit late :)

We asked this week that everyone interpret the topic "Envy and Singlehood" however you wish, so I'm really excited to read all of the different perspectives/interpretations!

When I think about envy and how it relates to my current "status" as a single woman, I immediately recall moments (or days, weeks, months, etc.) when all I could think about was what others had that I wanted and why I didn't have that. I've talked before about how patience in the wait for "my future" to begin is a struggle. 

Well, I think envy is something that makes having that patience a very difficult feat.

It's so easy to be envious of your friends who are married when you so desire marriage.

It's so easy to be envious of the couple you see while people-watching at a coffeeshop when you so desire to have someone hold your hand and make you feel special.

It's so easy to be envious of the friend who seems to have it all together as a single person when you really do want to be "okay" with your single status.

So, ok, it's one thing to recognize that you have an issue with these things, it's another to take steps toward overcoming these vices. So what am I doing to overcoming this situation I have with envy?

Well, for one, I'm making a daily effort to recognize the GOOD in my life: as it is right now.

My life is pretty good right now. 

I just moved into my very own apartment and am now living by myself for the first time in my life.

A few of my friends from college are moving to town this month and I'm super excited to spend time with them!

This weekend, I'm travelling to Charlotte, NC for my boss's wedding!

These are all GREAT things about my life as it is right now.

Now, that's not to say that I don't have my own struggles...like spending my entire summer raising support.

BUT with all of the travelling I've been doing, it makes me wonder if I could even juggle a relationship and all that I have going on right now. I honestly think being single throughout this fundraising-my-salary time period is best.

Also, prayer is really great. If you can get into (or in my case, back into) a good prayer routine, things just seem to be a lot easier...I think that's what they call grace. ;)

But the envy is always there....no matter how hard you try, when you're vulnerable and feeling weak, it creeps in. And I really believe that the only way to truly combat it is to acknowledge that this is something you are dealing with it and just make the effort to push past it every day. 

Denial ain't getting us nowhere.

If we are aware and prepared for these feelings of envy, hopefully we can deal with them head on and hopefully in the most productive way possible.

I can't wait to read all of the other thoughts on envy and singlehood over at Jen's!

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Next week's topic:

CHALLENGE TIME!

what did you do to take a step toward your vocation? we're excited to share and learn about your experiences!

Thank you to everyone who emailed us about your topic ideas! Jen and I are working on making up a new schedule and getting that out to y'all ASAP! But in the meantime, please don't hesitate to continue to send us what YOU would like to talk about!

Please email Jen or email me with your topic suggestions, questions, comments, etc.