A girl who works in my building got engaged last week (in PARIS. holy wow.) I'm so incredibly excited for her and her fiance to venture into this new part of their lives together.
While chatting today about the upcoming plans and excitement around this engagement time, one of the ladies in the office said something that stuck with me all day. She started talking about how she can remember when she and her husband became engaged and how she felt this overwhelming feeling of relief and that she "finally felt settled...I was no longer looking, waiting, wondering, anticipating...I finally felt content."
Now, you might be able to imagine how awkward it was for me to stand there as the only non-married or engaged (or even dating) person and take all of this in. In some ways, I can identify with those feelings and I struggle with them daily....this feeling of restlessness that Jen has talked about. And it's a challenge for me to rise above it and live my day to the fullest, regardless of those feelings. However, how has it become the norm for us to believe that in order to be complete, in order to be settled and content, that we need to be with someone else?
...well, as far as I've been told, you've gotta get a willing partner before jumping on that train....
All of these people are well meaning, and are simply curious about what's happening in my life. Yet, it makes it so. hard. to convince myself that I'm happy and content and settled when the consensus around me is that I shouldn't be because I haven't found the love of my life yet.
NEWS FLASH
I'm 22.
Going on 23 (next week).
I. am. young.
I have A LOT of time.
And so yes, while I desire for that next part of my life to begin sometime in the near-ish future, I am just fine. And if there are any young, single girls reading this who also feel immensely called to marriage but it just hasn't happened yet, that's okay! You're fine just as you are, where you are right. now.
You are not broken. You are not lost. You are not left behind.
I told Jen that I think there needs to be some kind of support group for single women desiring marriage, and I still think that'd be cool. Or maybe a series of posts talking about various struggles within this stage of life? I don't know. Cindy at The Veil of Chastity does a beautiful job ministering to single women, and I hope to someday do the same as a married woman, however, while I'm where I'm at, why not try to do what I can?
Please let me know if this is anything you'd be interested in or know someone who might be...pass this along to them!
Know of my prayers for y'all!
xo, Morgan
I am with ya, my friend! :) (thanks for those shout-outs, btdubs).
ReplyDeleteI don't think when I was 22 I was actually at this point, but now that I am older (ew... that sounds horrible) I am definitely there. I would love to write more about being single and what we can do to help each other. Let me know what you are thinking! I am sure there are other ladies that would join, too! :)
We are suppose to be content with Jesus, right?? But, HOW do we do that all the time? How do we make sure we are, so our minds don't wander down the path of what ifs and questioning and all that? hmmm... things to ponder.
Liesl at The Spiritual Workout has a "Being Single" series, and she is totally awesome! Also, do you read Seraphic Singles? There is a nice crew there, too.
ReplyDeleteI know and sympathize with what you are talking about! Praying for all the wonderful single ladies & gents I know who are yearning to meet their spouses and begging St. Raphael to intercede!
Support group?! Heck yes. Posts about being single? Yes, please! I'm happy to contribute however I can (I have a few posts on my blog about the single life and I've written a few for others, including Liesl's Being Single series)!
ReplyDeleteCindy is pretty darn rad too =)
I think there is a definite mentality of, "Oh, you aren't married yet? Well...that stinks, you really are missing out on life." And that mentality drives me nuts!
p.s. Thanks for this post, it is fabulous =)
Thank you for the link love, Morgan! Thanks be to God that my blog is ministering to you. Loved this part: "You are not broken. You are not lost. You are not left behind." Amen.
ReplyDeleteThank you again! Cindy
p.s. thank you Amanda for saying I am 'pretty darn rad' :) Totally made my day.
The beauty of your words bring tears to my eyes. You are not only just fine...you are PERF-TIC!!!
ReplyDeleteMorgan, this is such a beautiful post! I can certainly relate with the teasing. When I was with my ex-boyfriend, it seemed as if my family was lobbying for our relationship. Perhaps the added pressure was among the reasons for our break-up? Anyway... Thank you for writing this post and sharing so much of your heart here. I look forward to reading more of your journey. You'll be in my prayers! God bless you!
ReplyDeleteI so recognize this! I'm quite content with living my life as it is. Yes, of course I'd like to get married one day, but there's no reason to pity me or tell me "I'll be fine". I am fine!
ReplyDeleteBut I also get the heebie-jeebies from women who keep yelling there's nothing wrong with singles my age. Huh? I don't go yelling there's nothing wrong with people my age who are married either.
Anyway, this is turning into a little rant, so I'll stop. I've written a short series on being single a while ago. Check it out if you want to!